#but hyperia is even bigger
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Thorpe Park just announced that their new roller coaster is opening on the same day I was already booked to go with my dad. I'm so excited.
#it'll be the tallest and fastest in the UK#i already posted about this on my roller coaster blog but I'm so excited i gotta share it here too#trying to reign in my excitement a little because it'll probably be really busy#and rides often break down or have capacity issues on day one#can't wait to see what the skyline looks like now#i used to live ten minutes drive from thorpe park and you could see stealth from the motorway#it just towers above the treeline#but hyperia is even bigger
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Hm! I feel a rant coming on! Everyone duck!
MY THOUGHTS ON THE HYPERIA STORY AND ITS THEMING. ALSO A GENERAL RANT ON COASTER THEMING.
Let start with a general question: what counts as theming?
To me, theming is the set pieces, pre-show, and anything laid out in a rides area to help develop a story. Most of the time this helps world-building more than anything. To me, even music can be a piece of theming because it helps to set a tone. For example, when riding Smiler, the laughter sounds almost manic and it makes you realise straight away that something is off, before you even step foot into X-sector.
Anything that DOESN'T fall into this classification such as website and app pages, falls into "storytelling". In a theme park, it is almost impossible to tell the entire story from one repeated instance inside of said story. To tell a complicated story like that of the Smiler, it would take so much exposition, which is very much not the point and would take away from the experience as a whole.
So storytelling isn't a bad thing, it's how they handle it.
To me, there are three behemoths of theme park theming and storytelling worldwide. That I know of.
Baron 1898, X-Sector post-Smiler, And Forbidden Valley post-Reborn.
Baron 1898 is pretty easy to grasp while you're there, even as a non-speaker of the language. You're going on a mine tour and 3 ghost ladies are PISSED that you're going down there. The actual theming is downright impressive ans I would love to see it in real life. You can then look up the story to find out who the ghosts are, who the Baron is, and how the mine came to be. Really good treat for people who decide to look.
Forbidden Valley has a story that has remained relatively consistent throughout the years. It has wondering actors that establish the world in a realistic yet entertaining way rather quickly. There are an official operation; there are people opposing the operation so there is something sneaky going on; there is a tour group taking advantage of the centrepiece so the Alien is a tourist attraction in this universe, too. Just little things that help put together a bigger picture.
Of course this starts coming apart a little bit when the audio starts explicitly telling you what is happening, but it still holds. You see someone's office, a crashed helicopter, weapons for warding off the alien. All things to help build up this universe you are now ankle-deep in. And then there's the 3 pages on the Internet that break down the story for you, which can also be seen in the shop.
Finally, of course, there's X-sector. It doesn't usually have roaming actors, and the theme suits better that way. Without the roaming actors, you see that the Ministry are secretive. Trying to stay out of the limelight, except for the skeleton crew they send out to keep the coaster safe and operational. It shows a tone.
However, people casually wondering what this is about can never get an easy answer. Cause the answer is spread out across what remains of a decade-old marketing campaign. Fun for people who want a deep dive, not so fun for people who are just lightly curious. The website barely tells you anything either.
But, on a positive light, the story is so complex it keeps a fandom. Not many coasters have that. It's an insane accomplishment.
And I have a theory as to why. Now, stay with me here I think I'm about to upset some people:
It has aspects of social and political commentary. "Not everything is political" ALL GOOD ART IS A COMMENTARY ON THE TIMES AND CIRCUMSTANCES YOU WERE RAISED IN SIT YOUR ARSE BACK DOWN.
RIGHT, so, Smiler is a story about the government dedicating an organisation to keeping people artificially content to keep people compliant. What are Brits notorious for doing, in comparison to the French?
Doing fuck all. This wasn't always the case. We would riot, we would strike. Now we strike but while the other half of the country complains and just tells the strikers to sit back down and take the mistreatment. We are miserable, we complain, and we go about our day. And that's the joke. Its funny. So why bother changing it?
And if we can't be bothered changing something cause it's funny, what happens if they make everything purposefully funny? They'd never have to deal with the strikes in the first place.
The government functions off of our social compliance, which can come from making jokes at our own expense. We even see it now with our drowned-rat-faced PM as he continues to make a fool out of himself so he's funny. If he's funny, we want to see him more. That's a valid strategy nowadays.
Smiler. Is about how Keep Calm And Carry On is a stand against progress.
Smiler. Is a political and social commentary on the people of Britain. You're welcome.
Anyway!
HOW DOES THIS RELATE TO THE NEW WORLD-STAGE COASTER IN STAINES?
The problem is: it doesn't. Instead of taking inspiration from its sister park, Alton, Thorpe decided to take inspiration from Icon and its shoebox station.
Where is Fearless Valley taking place? When is Fearless Valley taking place? What point in the story are we looking at here? The issue [only issue, really] with Hyperia, is it entirely relies on storytelling and a few bits and bobs in the queue.
Remember the shortcoming in Nemesis? Where you can get a good grasp of the story without it being blasted in your ear? Yeah here they straight up tell you the story, too. The theming has BECOME the storytelling.
Next question: what is Hyperia, the coaster, supposed to be? Yes, we know the story is that a goddess called hyperia overcame her fear of the sea by building wings and escaping the island she was trapped on [for some unspecified reason. Is hyperia evil?], but what IS the coaster supposed to be?
Smiler is the Marmaliser, the machine that transforms you into a smiling advocate. Nemesis is the tentacles of the monster overtaking the metal that pins it down. Baron is the track the drill takes to get into the mine.
What is Hyperia? Are we following Her as she soars, were we stuck with Her; the Icarus to her Daedalus? Are we following in her footsteps as part of a ceremony Her followers reenact for her blessing? Are we supposed to be Her? It's never really specified.
The station is chocked full of a last-ditch attempt of theming, which in comparison with the whole lotta nothing you get from the queueline? It feels cramped. It feels cheap. It barely feels like it belongs on a stage alongside Taron, Velocicoaster and Voltron Nevera. If they didn't have the budget to do the storytelling and the theme, they should've gone for theme.
Any story with no theme feels cheap and artificial. Any theme with no story still stands out and has breathtaking scenes. If they focused more on the white-gold colour palate and maybe had a few statues around and about they could pass it as some sort of pantheon, like climbing Olympus.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm disappointed in all aspects of the Hyperia theming. It feels lazy, tacky and underwhelming when you consider Swarm is a 5 minute walk away. I'm hoping it improves at some point.
I geniunely think the stone head of Collosus is much better than anything in Fearless Valley and its inconsistencies. The Black and gold buildings feel very sleek and out of place for a story ultimately about a goddess who forged. She forged her own wings. She forged her own bravery. Shouldnt the building look a little home made? Where are the bolts? The soldering? I want to see her anvil and hammer pride-of-place, not shoved in the corner of the station.
Cmon thorpe. Get your arse in gear.
#im getting glitches on one of the paragraphs here. im done with trying to fix it#Thorpe park#hyperia#i am now going to dedicate my next week to learning blender n shit so i can recreate Fearless Valley with the idea in my head.#im totally normal about all this#anyway the ride itself looks like Something Truly Special#let it be known i am not hating on tbe layout i think it geniunely must be best in the UK.#smiler#the smiler#ministry of joy#x-sector#smiler as commentary on the compliance of the British Public#which technically makes smiler an artwork#no?
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